Simple Premise #4 — Relationships Can Be Simple

| August 17, 2012 | 0 Comments

Image: FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I think the area of my life that has the most potential to become crazy is not the material in my house but my relationships.

I don’t think I am the only one.

Speaking from personal experience I have spent hours of time thinking, worrying, stressing, and more about relationships when they are not working right.  I am a people pleaser and it is just the way I am.  I think people pleasing is pretty important in society today and thankfully I am not the only one :)

Relationships Can Get Crazy Just Like Material Possessions

Take for example last night.  My husband ordered a product we thought we wanted to use for photography but after installing it and both of us looking at it for a few minutes we knew it wasn’t what we wanted.  Not a bad product, but not worth it for us.  It had a 30-Day No Questions Asked Money Back Guarantee.  …I thought the meaning of that was fairly clear.  We decided we didn’t want it in less than 2 hours and asked to get our money back.    Well, lets just say that it wasn’t a ‘no questions asked’ guarantee.  The seller was all upset we didn’t like it and kept asking why.   We felt like we somehow had to prove we didn’t like it.   I mentally spent way to much time being frustrated with the situation and worried about him being upset with us.   It wasn’t my problem, and I wasn’t doing anything wrong.

This was a random seller who I have never met before.  What about when relationships much closer to us get crazy?  Friends? Family? Work associates?  It causes hurt and stress.

But We Need Relationships

You can be an introvert (like me) and still need relationships.  How can we grow relationships and have them simply add to our life instead of adding stress and craziness?  Here are a few things I have learned.  This is certainly not a complete list, I would love to have you add more insight in the comments.  As I said before I am not an expert in this area.

1. Pick Your Relationships Wisely

I hate to start with this, but it really does make a difference.  Some people are more prone to conflict, getting offended, or just plain drama.  If you are married or for members of your family this won’t work for those relationships, but for friends and work associates we do have a choice who we create (or keep) relationships with.  Don’t go un-friending a whole pile of people in a shot but decide which relationships you want to work on building in the future and which ones might need space.

2. Open Communication

If there is a problem, or a perceived problem, bring it up right away.  ’When you said…. I wasn’t sure how to take it.  What did you mean?’ can fix a problem very quickly without letting it boil into something much bigger.  If someone else come to you wanting to open up this communication make sure they are heard and respected for it.

3. Feed Relationships if You Want Them to Grow

So painfully obvious and written about often, this is still one I need reminded of.  Just like a plant, if relationships are taken care of and given the things they need to grow – they produce fruit.  If they get forgotten about or don’t get the things they need problems pop up.  Just the laws of nature.  Feeding relationships doesn’t take any tricks, it takes time.  Money or gifts will never replace time and listening.

4. Some Sugar On-Top

Never replacing the needed time, adding something special to the relationship is fun.  Want to spoil the kids, thank your spouse, show friends you appreciate them – going the extra mile with something special (time, service, or a gift) can go a long way.

5. See Relationships For What They Are

Reality is often what we think we see.  The human mind is funny that way.  Our outlook and what we expect the world to be like has a lot to do with all the Simple Premise including this one.  If we see relationships as adding to our life and expect them to be simple they are more likely to deliver as planned.

Thanks so much for reading, be sure to check out:

Tags: , ,

Category: House And Home

About the Author ()

Lorilee is a writer, God seeker, intentional wanderer, wife, and mom. You can find out more about her at Loving Simple Living. She would love to meet and connect on Twitter, Facebook, Google+, and Pinterest. Have an awesome simple day :)

Leave a Reply

CommentLuv badge